Providence Residents Almost Die of Boredom

audience.jpgAP-Providence, RI: Several residents of Providence, RI have been admitted to St. Josephs Hospital with what was thought to be the flu. It has been discovered, through lengthy blood work, that they are on the verge of dying of boredom. Psychiatrists on staff suggested the boredom was due to weather patterns. The patients disagreed and stated vehemently that they were going to drop dead unless something exciting happened immediately. Buddy Cianci, hearing of the crisis, contacted Laurel Casey and requested that she move back to the city as soon as possible. The patients, upon promise of a springtime full of outrageous cabaret performances and ensuing ramifications, were released without bail.

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